… baldie

After months and months and months of debating on whether or not I should go super low, Corona made me do it.

I was in desperate need of a haircut and I knew that because of the stay-at-home orders in place, I wouldn’t be seeing the inside of a barber shop until early May……. and I just couldn’t wait that long.

Thankfully, the twins’ dad [my ex-husband, for our new friends!] has clippers and agreed to help me shave my head. I did quite a bit of the top and asked him every 3 seconds if he’d given me a plug or why he was going over the same spot and saying “BE CAREFUL!” a hundred times. I had a great time, he said he didn’t…. either way my head was shaved and I’m beyond happy!

I’ve ALWAYS had a toooooon of beautiful, thick, and shiny hair……..

But, I also hid behind it.
It was my security blanket.
What I felt made me pretty…. prettier.
What I felt made me worthy … worthier.
It was thick. Healthy. Dark & shiny.
It grew fast, it was long, & people loved it.

And, now i looooove this bald head!! There’s nothing to hid behind. Nothing to buffer me from anything. Nothing to find security in. And, I’ve never felt more beautiful, brave, strong, & capable.
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After cutting all of my hair off, a friend said “Is this beauty what’s been hiding behind all of that that hair?” All that could be seen was what was there- distraction free. I’m essentially going bald now and I feel more beautiful now that when I achieved the most perfect twist out.

Kind of like now. We’re stripped from everything and just about everyone that made our lives “our lives”. Everything we depended on. Everything that distracted us. Made us feel loved and accepted. Gave us happiness. And, purpose.
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And, what are we left with?
Hopefully the realization that what we’ve got is actually pretty stinking amazing. 🖤

Hopefully we get that life is short and fragile and anything can take away the very things & people we love so much.

While I’ve never been one to be good at hiding emotion yet very good at knowing what I want and working for it….. I feel even more confident in living so much more confidently, refusing to hide behind “too cute”, “too _____”, and “not ______ enough” to do anything.

I walked out of my classroom not realizing that I wouldn’t see my students the following Monday. It’s been THREE Monday’s. Life is too short. You never know when the last time is the last time and opportunities don’t run like buses.

We’ve got about 22-23-ish [cant count, don’t judge me] certain days left of this quarantine life and it’s definitely interesting. The girls are having fun with learning, they’re having a great time being home and I’m thankful for me the time with them.

So, so far…… we are doing well. I am cooking just about daily and my tummy area is proof of that! I’m definitely going to work from this point out to eat much better than I have been. Our meals consist of mainly pastas because that’s all the girls want to eat right now. however, next grocery store run, I will for pick up all things required for salads, because I refuse to leave out of this quarantine with as a bad baldie with a belly. 🙂

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…. social distancing

Y’all. The CoronaVirus [in my Cardi B voice] led isolating and quarantining has been interesting….

I struggled for a couple days, in all honestly.
HOW. ARE. YOU?!

At first, the “break” was nice and relaxing…. as an introvert who doesn’t get much rest, it was incredible. I loved slow days and spending time with my girls. However, it’s also reminded me of why I decided to be more social this year AND how much I need interaction. There have been more FaceTime calls than ever before and it’s been a relief as much as it’s been fun.

We’re taking the distancing and stay-at-home orders seriously and staying in as much as possible. Walks and time spent outside has been all things necessary and exciting for the girls. We’ve gone for long walks which allowed us to practice safety skills, such as crossing the street and watching for cars at driveways. Although I’m seeing that even going outside for walks and play isn’t the best idea. Y’all. So tough.

Why they chose to wear boots outside is beyond me…. a great opportunity to learn from natural consequence and listening the next time you don’t want to. lol

As far as the teaching/learning from home…. mercy.
Homeschooling has been going well-ish. As we are working I’m able to see the areas that need strengthening and that’s been fun for me. As a teacher, I enjoy sharing information and passing on knowledge, I enjoying finding new ways to help my girls understand a concept. As a momma, I enjoy spending time with my kids and being with them without the stress of teaching them ALL the things. But, at the same time, the opportunity to add another layer to our relationship has been fun. Frustrating, too….. but mainly fun. I’ve had a great time coming up with activities and different ways to teach them.

Has it been a challenge, yes. Have we gotten along every minute? Nope. Have I been excited to see them catching onto concepts and completing work? Ab.so.lute.ly. It’s a lot of work….. but nothing I stress about. Some days, we work really hard for an hour or so, go outside, have quiet time, and play the rest of the day. Some days we work for 30 minutes and go about our day. One day we didn’t do any school work.

While a lesson plan is non-existent, I do have an idea of what we will work on that day or week. I’m really choosing not to overly stress about anything while still choosing to be intentional about the girls learning and keeping up to what I am learning [& researching] is up to par. Because their school is teaching above grade level, we’re kinda wandering between Pre-K4 skills and early Kinder goals.

Bottom line, y’all. We’re having fun. And we are working.
And, trying to manage balancing the two.

We’re also balancing mental and emotional self care. I neeeeeeed quiet time, I neeeeeed time to myself. But, my girls ALSO need quiet time. They ALSO need time to decompress. I neeed time to be able to creatively express myself and do my girls. If I don’t have that, I’m not my best self. When they don’t get what they need, in their own individual ways, they aren’t either. So we’re all stressed out and annoyed with each other. We need breaks…… from school. from breaks (yup.). from each other.

This entire pandemic… this entire need to quarantine ….. this entire need to stop living life as we’ve known it and enjoyed it to be is hard. We are all trying to maintain some sort of normalcy in very opposite of normal circumstances.

End of the day…… we’re doing our best. All of us. And my little people are doing what they know. I am doing what I know. We mess up. We have fun. We chat it out and move on. Life lessons. No big.

Hope you guys are enjoying your time….. being intentional and thoughtful about what you’re doing, how you’re doing it, then of course, why you’re doing it…….. with love and a goal in mind. It’s a great time to do a lot of thinking and working through hard things. I did that last week and it was interesting to say the least. Thankful I did it and had a friend to chat with afterwards. Personal work and working through junk isn’t easy but for sure worth it.

This break has been good.
Necessary while it’s also been stressful, but….. good.
Thankful for the time and space.
How’re you….. really??

[Read more…]

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… coding with Osmo

The girls love all things technology + learning!! So combining the two are always so fun for them and makes my teacher/mama heart so happy when we find games and activities that they can play together, that stretch their imagination, that support their classroom learning, and even teach them something new!

One of our newest fave learning toy is our Osmo! They have an array of interactive learning games that are so insanely fun, and we were so excited to get their coding games!

Now y’all know I’m not techy at all and the idea of coding is interesting, but coding with Osmo is so fun! Such a simplistic, kid-friendly way to introduce coding technology to kids! It also helped to follow patterns, reinforce left and right, and problem solving!

We have a musical coding game and a more traditional game to create codes with! They’ve been so into Coding Jam that they haven’t even gotten to Coding with Awtie! That’s more of ‘giving directions’ (which is how I explained to the girls what coding is!) to Osmo’s character Awtie to walk, jump, move forward/backward/right/left and the number of steps he takes! Y’all. It’s legit exciting and I’m 3 seconds from breaking open the game myself and playing with it!

If you’re looking for a fun, interactive screen time way for learning activity for your family, this is literally it. Click the links to learn where you can snag your family their own Osmo learning tools!

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