easter sweets!

I’m not really a fan of chocolate, aside from a Reese’s, but these little bunnies have me craving all the chocolate kiss es ever!!! 

(One of my students says, “Oh, I just love their little chocolate cheeks!” Me, too, kid! Me, too!) 

   

       

         

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… one stage down, too many more to go

sweet babies(Rhy is fine…. caught her in the middle of a head turn. lol. No babe was harmed during our morning picture taking sesh!)

My babies will be 3 months old in a matter of days…. and, I’m definitely emotional about it.

Yes, of course, they grow. It’s no surprise.
That shouldn’t be a cause for tears and sadness.
Or, extra snuggles.

But, it’s worth that and more.

If you’ve been around awhile, you may remember quite a bit of this….. but, honestly so much of it has been stuffed so deep, I choose not to go back there.

But, I can’t forget this, and THIS!!!!!!!, and this… and, sadly,  this.
….. and, the years worth of heartache and sadness that came before May 2014…
When I posted this then this…. then, ultimately, this after everything was confirmed.
What a month that was… It’s amazing how quickly (“quickly”) things can change.

littlebitsThe fact that my babies have grown out of their newborn clothes, clothes that were so baggy on them when they came home….
and, their 0-3 month clothes are getting snug.
Their first headbands are getting a bit tight.
Their first shoes have the teensiest room left in the foot.
4oz of milk is becoming quite the joke.

Babies I weren’t supposed to be able to have are here. They are thriving. They are growing so well.
These girls have the best personalities. One’s personality is gigantic and literally comedic. The other more laid back and serious. Her facial expressions and smiles are the sweetest because you know when she smiles, she means it.

I have a couple of sweet friends, specifically, who struggled with me through our experiences of infertility and loss. And, it’s beyond beautiful to see them preparing to welcome their sweet babies.

All mamas are crazy emotional about their babes. All mamas can’t believe they grow so fast and time races as quickly as it does. I’m not minimizing any mamas love for their child. But, as with anything else, when you struggle and struggle and lose and work so very hard for something you want from you core, there’s a different type of appreciation. A different type of emotion that wells up about everything.

shoesBecause it wasn’t supposed to be.
But, God’s plan turned out to be very different and much more amazing than what we could see.
It resounded louder than all that we’d heard.
It redeemed all of the pain we’d felt.

And, how can you not be emotional over such a miracle?

While I’m sad about what’s behind us, I’m so gun shy and timid about what’s in front of us. I almost separate their age/development in 3m intervals. Kinda like their clothes! lol.
While 0-3m was a learning curve for us, I’m somewhat looking forward to investing in more clothing/shoes for them. They have a couple of more pairs of shoes and NB headbands outside of what’s been pictured because I chose not to purchase so much when I knew they wouldn’t be going out much for most of that time span and also they grow so quickly. We didn’t wear a few NB items and a lot of their NB size clothes I was able to donate to another preemie mama friend. Which was really fun. The bonus, I still have another kid’s worth of clothes I will probably donate! Lol.
So, 3-6 months…. We’ll be able to wear spring/summer clothes & shoes which I’m really pumped about. I’m sure they’ll end up with much more clothes/shoes this time!! I’m also anticipating the developments that come with having two 3-6m olds! (I can’t believe I’m saying that!) I’m so ready to see how these girls interact with each other as they grow! Sitting up, crawling, little baby teeth, real food (!!!), more cooing/babbling, more twin interactions, more of everything.

bocobaby
I’ll definitely miss the newness of everything. Over the last couple of weeks, they’ve started to hold on to you when you hold them. They wrap their little baby arms around you while they hold their heads up and look around and it makes me melt. They aren’t limp newbies anymore who aren’t able to actively participate in their world. They are learning to effect and control. The first time they reach their arms out for me I’ll probably burst. I think the little “hugs”, responding to kisses & letting you know they want more,  along with both of them smiling consistently and responsively were my favorite parts of this last stage. Oh, and of course, sleeping longer through the night!

One thing I am a bit undecided about, but at the same time very excited to start in this new stage is feeding these babies real food! We tried giving them a bit of applesauce on a spoon and they totally aren’t ready for a spoon! I’ll give them another few weeks, then see where we are after that! We were gifted a Baby Bullet and I have a good friend who owns Southern Cadence Cuisine that has offered to help me with preparing natural, tasty foods for the girls! She offers lessons in preparing your cuties nutritious meals that are age appropriate. She starts at 5 months, so if your babe is nearing that age, definitely contact her and let her know you’re interested in Cooking for Cuties!! I’m going to start lessons soon so I’ll know what I’m doing when we’re ready for the girls to have food!! (If you visit, tell her Alaina sent you!)

These last three months flew by so insanely fast…….. Can’t wait for the next 3!

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matchy matchy

Processed with VSCOcam with t1 presetNow, I love having twins. I mean, it’s fantastic. Two at once. If we were to only want two kids, we would be absolutely done.

And,

I got two girls.

Honestly, I wanted a combo pack. I wanted a boy so badly because they’re so darn cute and dirty….. And, I wanted a girl because they’re so darn cute and girly. It was going to be the best of both worlds and completely epic.

But…… These girls are epic.

They have me matching and coordinating with them. I never thought I’d do that! I thought it was so lame and way too much work and I wanted them to have their own identities and not feel like they had to be the same all the time. Well, scratch all that. They’re going to be individuals anyway so dressing them exactly the same won’t have an adverse effect on their personalities. And, isn’t part of the fun of being a girl matching with your friends and siblings? Isn’t that something that girls just do? I’m pretty sure because all through my schooling (even through college!!) I remember at some point, there was a “Hey! We could all wear this!” moment…. or moments. lol. It’s what you do as a girl and shame on me for denying such an innate desire and stifling my inner girl by not wanting to match.

What was I thinking?
(Besides…. If only I had a bow…… For real.)

Juggling these two can be super easy, but it can also be really hard and stressful. REALLY stressful. More often than not it’s easy. It’s doable. I got this.

And, you learn to smile through it because it passes.

The chaos always passes.

What’s funny is being out in public or at someone’s house and you begin to juggle. At first, it’s like “whoa… do you need help?” And, my automatic response is “nope!” and we do what we always do. My intention isn’t to be mean or anything, but juggling is what I do all day, every day. I need to be a lot more accepting to the help of friends/family just to give myself a break but I just don’t think about needing help all the time. My day would be miserable if I cried “I need help!” all day without learning how to just get things done. (Like feeding two at once or feeding one while comforting another. No one is expecting miracles like actually getting dressed or cleaning anything. lol)  What’s funnier that their expression when things start to get a little nuts is their response after we’ve juggled and settled everything down….. “Whoa… I have no idea how you do it.”

Honestly, neither do I.

(Oh….. we’re handling that belly – no worries. Plexus has us covered.)

But, I’m thinking I need to add “baby juggler” to my resume.
“Oh, what do you do?”
“I juggle babies….. Like a boss.”

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