… create it 

If you follow me on Insta, you may have seen this post already, if you haven’t, here you are…

” I have done a lot of CREATING over the past year. I didn’t waste time “looking” for myself, I didn’t search for happiness in things, people, or activities.

What I did do is CREATE belief in myself, & belief in who I COULD be based on who God FORMED me to be. I set goals goals based on dreams that settled in my heart back when I was a little girl. I created a positive mindset, I created a perspective on all things that said “This event will not define me. I will be more than ‘okay’. I AM AND WILL BE AMAZING, I WILL THRIVE, I WILL ACHIEVE, I WILL BE HAPPY!” in spite of what comes my way!
I’m in charge of how I feel and how I view my circumstances. I make the choice of whether or not I will have a good day, if I will be frustrated or angry, if I will CHOOSE to refill my cup rather than deal with it being half full. If I choose to wallow or stand boldly!
Life is all about choice and creating what you want to see, experience, & how things will go for you.

I’ve been there. In the dark, not knowing if things will ever be okay, but I promise you that it can be….. if you CHOOSE & WORK for it to be! I hope that if you’re struggling with ANYTHING in life, that you BELIEVE that hurt, pain, disappointment, & fear do NOT have to last always. That you can be filled with the hope, bravery, belief, & faith to be and do better!! I believe in you!! #plexusbelieve”

I wrote this at our Plexus convention after taking a pic in front of this banner. Because, it’s perfect.. is it not? #yes 

I’m learning to create what I wish to find… in myself, my relationships, my work, my conversation. I’m learning that being still (sometimes for a while) is a part of the creative process. I’m learning to be who I needed to others. 

The girls have mainly been with their dad for the past few weeks and I’m missing my girls deep. So I’m scrolling through pictures on Insta and in every picture I’m smiling. Even in the pictures I specifically remember having the worst day or previous night, when I felt at my absolute lowest, there was a smile. As my thumb passed over the pictures, pulling up older and older photos, a thought flashed through my mind….. I wonder if I’m the me I needed three years ago……and the only answer I can come up with is that that woman who dealt and endured and fought and cried and pressed and shouted and tried and failed (and succeeded) was exactly who she needed to be then. And, I believe that girl is cheering this one on.  

I’m a believer in creating what you can’t find, creating what you need and want. I’m a believer in counseling and personal growth and becoming so that you are prepared to deal with what comes around the corner – both in and through the moment. I believe in questions and understanding, kindness and love, in second and third chances and yet standing your ground. 

I believe in creating a life you love and choosing who & what will bring you closer to your happy. I believe in making it your own. 

Also, that things truly come in time. But the come faster when your living in peace, joy, love, & harmony. That loves causes all things to grow well. Plants, relationships, kids, self esteem, & self worth……. everything grows better when it’s happy. Food is even tastier & your performance at work is better when you’re happy. 

Sometimes you have to create the happy you’re looking for. Create what you need. Carve out the time to revive your soul, lay down your burdens, get a little salt water in or out of your system (tears, sweat, or the sea) & make yourself happy and overwhelm yourself in joy. 

  1. If the privately broken girl was not drowned in the ‘come hell or high water’ or the ‘come what may’, you can make it, too. Because you’re strong. I believe that if I am happy & better than I’ve ever been, and at peace after complete brokenness, there’s more than the slightest chance you will be, too. The happiness and joy begins when you choose to move on from what happened and grow. You are growing and there’s something so much greater for you to do past this. This doesn’t define you. It’s a part of you, but it’s not who you are. 

Everything won’t always be perfect. There will be days you feel disconnected and nights you cry yourself to sleep. There will be some hard and dark moments, but in those times you have to fight for yourself. Your own voice has to be louder, more calm, more steady, more convicting, & sure than the noise. That voice that tells you that you can, that you’re good enough, that you’re strong enough, ready enough, & committed enough to keep going. 
Because you are. 

{note to self}

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Comments

  1. It’s been such a joy to follow your journey and watch God mold and shape you along the way. I needed to hear this today. Desperately!

    • Aw thank you girl…. I needed to get it out so that I could go back and re-read it myself. Tell myself to keep going! Glad it was good for you, too!!!

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