11 months old….

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We’re eleven months into this thing and I’m still blown away at the Lord’s goodness and his choice to bless me with two beautiful babies.

I look at them and cannot believe how fast the last few months have flown by, I don’t want to believe that their “intense shows of drama” (really it’s a tantrum, ok?!) are real and they aren’t playing. That they are doing what they can to get their way. The fact that they give kisses melts my heart – especially when they are kissing each other. I literally belly laugh at them fighting over toys and babbling back and forth at each other.

Children are a for sure blessing and these girls bring joy to everyone around them! They are well loved and so loving. They have the sweetest laughs and absolutely love to play. Watching them do something new, something that we’ve been “working on” or that I’ve done with them in passing, with intention makes me realize how attentive they are and how sponge-like their minds how. I see how something so insignificant to me is such a big deal to them. Rhyann spontaneously started playing Peek-a-Boo with a blanket! Say, what?! We’ve just played with our hands – never an object. She plays interactive games so well it’s hilarious! The fact that they do things you have no idea they knew how to do is shocking…. they’ll offer you something then pull it away when you reach for it. They’ll fake you out by reaching out for you and then turning away when you reach for them!  wall2If these girls have done nothing more, they have motivated me. They’ve caused me to want to be better for them. To learn to do so many things better for their sake…. One thing I’m being forced to pay attention to is not holding to a one for all mindset. While it’s so much easier to have one method of putting to sleep, one bath time, one this or that and expecting it to work well for both girls (because it’s easier for me) is incredibly selfish but it’s also stretching me in a lot  of ways. I try not to look at their need for individualism as an inconvenience, but as an opportunity to learn about the girls  as individuals. Imagine how nice it is to have someone’s undivided attention… I can only imagine how that attention and focus could improve their day. Because my day isn’t only about me. Each of us have “a day” and it’s my job to make sure that one day doesn’t control or negatively impact their day. We’re all in this together and what’s convenient for me can’t dictate what their day looks like. What kind of model is that? In order for us to do life well together, we have to show a certain level of consideration, patience, and sacrifice. I have to consider them just as I would hope that they learn to consider their sister and others. I’m queen of the caste, but everything isn’t about me. wallI mean…. I don’t think it gets much cuter than this!

The girls are babbling more often and with more emotion… They fuss at each other and fuss at you. They squeal and clap and cheer! “Yay” is definitely one of the words I hear a lot! They say “hey” which is hilarious! Logan will say “night, night”, Rhyann imitated “bye, bye” this morning. (!!!!!!!!) They’ll sign “eat” spontaneously and with purpose. It’s a joy to hear them talking! More words are on their way and so is a step or two (I hope)…..

Motherhood is a joy… No matter how tired you are, how frustrated you are, how worn out you are – I love how motherhood pushes you even further than you thought you had the capacity to go. And, I love the model of unconditional love, unending effort, never ending forgiveness, and total acceptance it brings out of us and models for them and world.

One of my goals is to create a peaceful, accepting, joy and love filled environment for them. That they feel loved and accepted. That they will one day learn that the only way they have been loved so well is because of the overflow from Christ’s love through me and other’s around them. That we aren’t loveable by nature, that we aren’t forgiving and patient by nature, that they will do things and behave in a certain way that will disappoint, anger, and hurt me. I don’t even want them to think that they are perfect and always innocent, and I especially don’t want them to think that I think they are always good kids and unable to initiate or be involved in things they shouldn’t do or sin. I want them to know they are sinful and how sinful they are. I want them to know that because we sin, we need a Savior. And, I have to love them to Christ. Not force them, or berate them, or humiliate them to our loving God. If they’re earthly parent isn’t loving them, why would they believe someone else could? Discipline is real and necessary… another individual approach will need to be taken for it to be effective for each kiddo, but we can discipline in love and lovingly. We can create and instill boundaries and self discipline with love. It’ll make life easier for their teachers, coaches, friends’ parents, … heck, ME! lol….. We can go on all day about that and how we can go about creating sweet environments for our babies, but I’ll stop my rambling and because we each have our own reasons for how and why we parent the way that we do. I just pray and depend on God for the wisdom to do it a way (among so many) that’s pleasing to the Lord and respectful to my children as people.

Happy 11 months to the happiest, most beautiful, and playful girls!! Mama loves you!

….. um, have y’all heard Lecrae’s Boast??? UGH… so good! Listen and let me know what you think!!!


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