… guarded, under lock and key


First, this whole infertility whirlwind has done a number on my heart, my soul, my family, and my LIFE.

And, God, do I appreciate it.

I truly, truly appreciate this two year ride that seems like two seconds in one minute and a lifetime in another.

I’ve learned to keep a tight lid on what’s “happening” because you never know how quickly things can be undone or make a sharp left turn.

I’m so incredibly open and it’s difficult to not shout from the rooftops even the most intriguing and incredible possibilities that come about. But, I know that keeping your cards close to your chest is wise and also saves you from backpeddling and pulling your foot from your mouth.

With that said, (lol) I, generally, keep my lid shut tight with the exception of a close knit group of a few who I trust with my everything, will trust my babies with, and know they have my back like no other. I know they pray for me and hope for me with a faith and love that is rooted so deeply in God. My God they are a great group and I appreciate them to the ends of the Earth.

As tight as my lid is being kept, I want you to know and understand how beautiful this story of mine/ours is. How much glory God is receiving from it and these chapters are yet to be complete. How much we deeply we need your prayers and support. We appreciate the chats but do understand if I/we sidestep a question that we can’t quite answer as honestly as we’d like. Know that this process is costly, timely, tiring, mentally and emotionally consuming. We are working hard and doing our best to do our best.

This man… my God… is doing more than I could ever ask, think, or imagine. It is happening. He is showing who He is and what He can do. Even if things don’t work out exactly how it COULD, I now that it will work out exactly how it should. He will receive the most glory for however this will end and I am excited. God is so good and He is on our side.

I have NO idea what will happen next but there is a peace I’ve never felt before… a giddiness that won’t lead to disappointment… the surest hope that keeps us going…. and, a trust that allows for both peace and giddiness to reside in the same place along with hope without room for sadness or a slither of a feeling of defeat.

We have a lot of HARD work ahead of us…. a very long road…. No matter how “quickly” our process goes – the road is long, incredibly detailed, and hard. But, we’re gearing up and prepping as much as we can, learning as much as we can.

His timing. His plan. His glory. Our story.

…. here’s to an amazing story written by a God who cannot fail.

ugh… so giddy. so excited. so quiet. so focused.

…. the shirt hubs is wearing in the picture is FOR SALE!!! $20 each … if you would like one, send your name, shirt size, physical/email address to thomasandalaina@yahoo.com!!
…. you can also help by depositing a little (or big! lol) donation at http://themayesadopt.mydagsite.com/ !!!!!

Thank you so much!! We love (and, need!!) you!!!



  1. […] few posts ago, I wrote about keeping the lid on what was going on with us because we just didn’t know which way things were going to go or […]

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