… lucky

The anticipation is literaly kill.ing me!

I’m excited and so grateful to have the skills and gifts that God has so graciously placed inside of me. Skills and gifts that I am desperately trying to hone, improve, and utilize for His glory. I want to be great for Him. I get so nervous and excited about opportunities that land at my little feet just hoping I don’t crush them and ruin them with ME. My selfishness and desires to be great for me…. I am grateful for Christ molding me and focusing my heart on Him so that my heart’s desires are to honor Him in everything I do… And, ever grateful that He is as gracious, merciful, and forgiving when I don’t honor Him. Makes me love Him more.

…… and, to this one. The greatest gift I’ve ever recieved and one that I didn’t even realize I needed or wanted. He is a man after God’s heart and  it’s a blessing to have him next to me encouraging me and challenging me… pushing me outside of my comfort zones to be better… he is with me when we’re going through the ups and downs of unifying in these two very short years of marriage…. he’s with me. Always. Even when I’m the worst Alaina and he’s with me when I’m the best Alaina. THAT I can never thank God enough for. He is helping God help me become the best I can be. He shows me me and turns me to God, constantly shows God to me. Constantly patient and forgiving even when I’m impatient and annoyed. He has made me better. He has matured me. Challenged and widened my persepective.
I have it pretty good.

Our pastor/friend/marriage counselor reminded me earlier this week how I said that “…I believe that God put us (& kept us) together for a very specific reason and He has something great to accomplish…”. I say he reminded  me because I’d forgotten that. When life happens and you’re experiencing the “ebbs and flow” of marriage as you are learning to “get” marriage and just figure out how this thing works – you sometimes forget that when you fully focus on Christ,  you are & become who He wants you to be. Doing what He wants you to do and HOW He wants you to do it. Focus, focus, focus on Him…. not on what you want or how you want it. Focusing on the “me’s, you’s, and I’s”, as Thomas calls it, distracts you from focusing on Him. And, potientally ruins what God is trying to accomplish.

Only when you focus on Him does EVERYTHING in your life work out the way HE wants it to. For HIS glory and for your benefit.

You have it better than you realize. I know we do.

…. here’s to being truly excited and grateful for the dates, hours, and minutes to come… for the time we have to honor and glorify Him.


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