… insecurity

*** deep inhale, biiiiig shoulder roll, exhale ***
Feels good to be back!
I’ve subconciously been shying away from my blog for a little bit now. For reasons that truly only equate to excuses and now that I’ve privately realized and acknowledged my little issues, I’m going to really work on getting back to logging my journey.
I’m starting to believe my journey is changing a bit. The path seems a bit “softer” in some ways, while in others a bit difficult but mangable. … maybe we’ve moved from concrete to gravel? lol…. I don’t know. It’s just…. different. I hope that I’m heading in the right direction but just growing stronger the longer I walk…… Maybe it’s the shoes? I’ve possibly taken a pit stop a ways back and swapped into the soft soles that conform to your feet??  Maybe I’m becoming a bit more comfortable in my ability the longer I’m on this road. It could be HOW I’m walking – I could be focusing on my posture or my stride length instead of the ground I’m walking on. Maybe it’s all of the above… a different course, a comfort in who I am, and a shift in focus.

Now, from what I hear, you do become more self assured as you enter into your 30’s…. Maybe I’m on my way a bit early….. as I will be turning an incredible 29 years old on Thursday!! lol (A shameless plug but I can’t help it!!!) Every year I get more and more excited about turning a year older. Not only does it beat the alternative but I love gaining wisdom and knowledge and just getting better!!! Makes me happy!! Lol.

Anywho….. back to the topic at hand.
INSECURITY!! lol… A (very long) four letter word that no woman in her right mind would dare admit to feeling at any point in their life. Especially in front of those who dislike, envy, or admire her. 🙂 lol
Well…. let the record show that THAT denial of true admittance to how you feel at one point or another is insecurity! ….. because you’re probably concerned about what someone else would think!

I just, just, just started reading a book titled “So Long, Insecurity” by Beth Moore and the wisdom and insight I’ve gained from reading the first few chapters is phenomenal. Freeing. And, encouraging.
Insecurity…. this feeling of inadequacey that drives us to dislike others for no real reason, to mistreat those around us. It makes us say “Oh, her hair….” and “If I had her body..” … it creates this monster inside of us that causes us to condemn and see ourselves as less than while we compare ourselves to others we’ve put on a pedestal – admiring the beautiful, problem free masks that are worn so well in public.

We have been taught and conditioned to compare and contrast ourselves against another – by society. Our parents. Significant others. Friends. And, we have become uncomfortable with who God created us to be. Unable to fullfill the will He has for our lives because we are insecure. Uncomfortable. Too prideful to admit tjat we are therefore unable to get the help we need to be better.

I wish I had this book ten years ago. Even a week ago. I wish I had it at some point before now – I’m curious as to where I would be in my walk with Christ and in other relationships – including the one I have with myself! But, I’m glad I have it now. I’m glad I have it so that I can pass the information along. So, I can maybe help another person, a younger person, become more self assured in who they are in Christ, who Christ created them to be, and their place in this world, in an effort to make their lives a bit more stressless.


 I can’t wait to read every single page of this book.  I even read the introduction. Who does that? I NEVER DO! lol.  I literally have to stop and pray at each revelation asking God to create in me a security rooted in Him that will cause me to truly believe by faith who I am in Him. It’s tough stuff. An excellent mirror. The reflection is what’s scary but with prayer and the wisdom and revelation from this book – I’m praying I find a freedom that releases me from the concern of what the world thinks of  me, and the negativity that I’ve ingrained in my own psyche.

GO BUY THIS BOOK!!!!! It’s $13 on iBooks. I’m sure the same price at the book stores. And, invest in a few highlighters and stickie notes – you’ll need them. And, before you balk and come up with excuses, ask yourself – WHY NOT? What is the worst that could happen from reading this book? At worst, you’ll learn how insecurity affects other people’s lives and maybe offer to lend your copy to an insecure person you know… at best, you’ll learn how insecurity is affecting your life and relationships and will ask & allow God to work in you so that you can find the assurance and confirmation you need in Him.

By it for yourself. Your future. Your child and their future. Let’s focus on raising little women (and, men) who fear the Lord, who balance self – esteem and true humility, and those who are so steadfast and secure in who they are in Christ and won’t be easily swayed and decieved because of little voices inside their heads that tell them they aren’t good enough.

…. here’s to the future generations of God believing women and men who will lead families of secure, loving, and courageous children who will be wildly effective for Christ! Secure in who they are. Secure in their God given ability. Secure in their own skin.

… And, YES!!! I am still going to the gym! I’ve even made a 5:30a appearance! And, plan to make plenty more!!! 🙂

Signature

Leave a Reply